This species of expatriate found Asia much more pleasant when it was theoretical, nicely ensconced on a glossy page inside of an Ivy-covered library, perhaps. The study trip he went on sophomore year was guided by professors and everyone they met was pleasing and English speaking, and someone ordered his noodles for him.

Why not go live in Southeast Asia and study the ancient art of Angkor-era stone carving? he thought. It’ll be a real adventure. I’ll become one with the people.

He would write a book to join the others on the shelves of that ivy-covered library. He would have a little Somerset Maugham moment. It would be romantic.

He was not prepared.